I wish you a Muppety Christmas

And a Happy New Year!

Goodness where has the time gone?

I'm soooooooooo sorry for not being able to blog earlier. Firstly I got a bit busy doing... stuff....y'know... like digging in the sandbags for the building work in the garden. Then Mum got poorly and couldn't help me with the computer so here we are... three days before this Christmas thing happens.

Mum says I have more presents through the post than she has. I think she's a bit miffed about that but whatever, they smell good, they look good and they will be ripped open in a few days apparently. My sisters have stuff too and ssssssh cousin Jimmy has something from us all too but tis a secret.

I've been working hard in the office. Apart from the incident-in-the-conservatory-room on the day I stayed with Jimmy and got carried away and Mum had to go round and clean the entire conservatory out. And today. I felt lazy today and for the first time in months Mum said she wasn't very happy with me having a poo in reception. I couldn't be bothered to tell her I needed to go out today, but after someone found some perfume I think they were all happy.

I have a new coat that fits me cos i grew. It doesn't have a cow pattern or a rider on it. It's posh, a proper grown up one.... I'll get Mum to take a picture soon, but here's one of me showing how much I'm growing.

I have been back to the grooming salon. But it's ok, you'd never know. I came out white. I look yellow now hahaha! Look at my manky feet!

And, just in case you thought I'd stopped being norty... well here's me showing the catwithnofurthing how to play. First... hide and seek... slowly does it. Put on the cute face...and...

Boooooooooooooooooooo! Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar!!! Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar! I AM THE MUPPET MONSTER!

Ok. She did swipe me, but I pretended she didn't. OK?

Is it Christmas yet?

Muppet to the Rescue!!

Yes, it's true, Muppeteers.

There was me, having a very boring Sunday. Till lunchtime that is. Then Mum drove down to Auntie Gwyn's house and picked her up so I could have a cuddle in the car. Mum said we were going to see Auntie Katiebob & Auntie Bister, whoever they were. Cassie said they were cool and so i figured they'd be ok.

Off we drove down the motorway. Mum and Auntie Gwyn had lots of gossipy type things to talk about, when Auntie Gwyn could get a word in edgeways after I'd kissed her all over her face.

Then. Suddenly, Mum stopped gossip and urgently said to Auntie Gwyn "look, there's a dog on the hard shoulder...!" and she pulled over (she does silly things like this on fast roads) and Auntie Gwyn said "there's two dogs!!"... uh oh. Panic...

And, they were right, running along the road at 200mph (or something like it) were two sexxxxy German Shepherd Dogs. Mum asked Auntie Gwyn if she could get out the car and try and get the dogs to come to her, as she slowed our car and put the hazard lights on and tried to slow the traffic in the slow lane. They realised what we were all trying to do and slowed down then I was shoved into Mum's arms as Auntie Gwyn ran to help... only the dogs suddenly swerved into the fast lane and everybody shut their eyes... and a silly driver who didn't notice what was going on suddenly braked in that lane and just missed the two doggies who were heading for the central reservation. At that point, Auntie Gwyn called them and they came running to her - hooraaay! By this time I was sitting on Mum wondering why she was talking to a Police Lady on the phone and why all this fast traffic wasn't going anywhere and why so many people had stopped to help Auntie Gwyn.

After the Police Lady farted around a bit while deciding what to do with two GSDs on a motorway (her solution was to send the Dog Unit - wooohoo!!) and Auntie Gwyn, Mum and I decided the safest thing to do was to let the lovely gorgeous beautiful GSDs in MY CAR!!! Goodness me!! So, I said they could get in and they did. They must've known it was a doggy car and that I was handsomely sitting there (drooling a bit, ok). They had very muddy paws and trod all over MY CAR but then sat on the parcel shelf like they belonged there.

Are they not fantastically gorgeously beautiful?? Auntie Gwyn told Mum she'd got a phone number and address from a collar on one doggy and so we told the police we'd take the dogs off the motorway and we didn't need the dog unit after all (booooo!). Then Mum phoned the owner and Auntie Gwyn told her off for letting their dogs get out and blaming them for being naughty! We took them both to meet their owner in a village just next to the motorway and told them how lucky they were to be alive, but I'm not sure they really got the message. But anyway, that's how Muppet saved the lives of two dogs. Aren't I fantastic? I didn't mutter a sound when they were in my car and I was very very happy to see such nice dogs who didn't want to eat me.

After all that excitement, we eventually got to Auntie Katiebob and Auntie Bister's house. Wow!!! It's very big and they had chickens wandering around next to some stables - and I didn't chase them or try to eat them! Mum was very proud of me.

Inside, wow again. There were a million and one dogs! All sorts of dogs, big skinny ones (Mum said they were longdogs), wierd herding ones like Meg, fluffy middle sized ones, big fluffy teddy bear ones and a puppy nearly the same age as me! And lots of cats, too. I only chased one of those, but it ran so it wasn't my fault really.

Hizzy thought I was a sheep, Mum said. He herded me all day. All day!

Willow, when she wasn't chasing chickens or horses, played with me. I love Willow but don't tell anyone, ok?

Tally seemed a bit scary at first but I really really really liked him, he was good fun.

Katie was a bit grumpy. But she's allowed.

Harry puppy was great fun! He goes to his new home on Tuesday so I taught him some more puppiness so he can be a bit Muppety when he meets his new mum and dad.

Mum said this is Echo. But it could be Gemma. They're like twins. Pretty twins if you ask a Muppet.

I said hello again to Auntie Gwyn. And then Auntie Bister. In the way only I can. Muppeted!

And Mum gave some of MY treats to Auntie Bister's dogs. They were a bit keen to eat them !! (notice how I wasn't begging but was off saying hello to other doggies??) Mum says this is a horrid picture of her so you can't laugh ok). Those bums belong to Tasha, Jonah, Jasmine, Willow and Tally. I only wee'd a little bit in the house. Honest.

We were there the whole day and I didn't sleep at all, not until everyone had dinner (I only shared a little bit). Then we came home and I cuddled Auntie Gwyn all the way home (just to keep her warm you understand).

I have slept a lot today. Goodness Muppetsuperhero and Muppetfriendtoalldogs, all rolled into one, I am. Phew. That's a lot of responsibility for a little hound dog. I carry it well.

By the way. Have you seen Mum's slippers? Well one of them. She seems to have lost it. It's a fluffy one. With a bit of a soggy chewed effect to the heel. Let her know if you do ;)